From Robert Lee Brewer:
For today’s prompt, write a memory poem. Pick a memory, any memory. It can be a significant event, but sometimes there are beautiful insignificant moments (that ironically are very significant–quite the paradox). Mine your memories to come up with something good today.
and another form I found and wanted to try...
ReplyDeleteSummer Days (Mirrored Refrain)
Summer days were long back then
We filled our days with hide & seek
We played hop scotch, tag and catch
Of boredom never did we speak.
We made fairy house of lilac and daisies
Friendships no one else could match
Of boredom never did we speak
We played hop scotch, tag and and catch.
Double Dutch and jacks were so much fun
While the sun kissed and browned each child’s cheek
We played hop scotch, tag and catch
Of boredom never did we speak.
At night we talk on the front porch
Until the mosquitoes made us scratch
Of boredom never did we speak
We played hop scotch, tag and catch.
This brought back such beautiful memories. We played from morning till night. Remember the table dad put out there so he could play jacks with us and not have to sit on the porch floor? We were always having fun and summer did last forever. Beautiful form. I don't understand it. But it sure made a lovely poem. We had a whole gymnasium in the backyard and our tent! I realize you were confined to the form. You couldn't fit everything we did into it. But you came close. LOL Good job!!!
ReplyDeletenah I wasn't confined by the form... I just didn't remember the things you mentioned but now I remember the swing set, sand box, dipsy doodle, round above ground pool and the tent!! dang wish i had remembered them as I was writing.
DeleteMirrored Refrain
DeleteThe Mirrored Refrain is rhyming verse form constructed by Stephanie Repnyek.
The poem is formed by three or more quatrains where two lines within the quatrain are the "mirrored refrain" or alternating refrain.
The rhyme scheme is as follows: xaBA, xbAB, xaBA, xbAB, etc..
x represents the only lines that do not rhyme within the poem. A and B represent the refrain.
The tent was always my favorite part of the backyard. I have a poem about that somewhere. LOL. I like this, but I think one of your refrain lines has a problem. "Of boredom never did we speak" is every awkward, and since it's repeated it stands out even more.
DeleteLoved the images, very nicely put. The form was OK,I prefer regular lines myself.I do agree with Victoria, not liking the reversed construction.
Deletelol... Victoria didn't like one line not the mirrored refrain concept. you never did like form :-)
Deletetoday I smelled cut grass
ReplyDeleteI was thrown back in time
to when I was but a little girl who
rolled down grass hills
I was thrown back in time
another day, another child
rolled down grass hills
with dreams in her heart
another day, another child
just watching clouds
with dreams in her heart
big dreams of wonderful things
just watching clouds
but she grew up
big dreams of wonderful things
dreams were forgotten now
but she grew up
had children of her own
dreams were forgotten now
that could never be because she
had children of her own
dreams were shattered
that could never be because she
watched her children roll down grass hills
dreams were shattered
to when I was but a little girl who
watched her children roll down grass hills
today I smelled cut grass
this is really well done but the last verse doesn't work. some editing needs done to clean it up. but yeah I remember those days and go back to that time every time our lawn is mowed and I smell the cut grass in the air.
DeleteNice imagery. I agree with Bonnie that the last verse doesn't quite work, but once again, doing a pantoum in one day is a major feat in itself.
DeleteFor some reason this struck me as a song. It would make a lovely one.
DeleteWe are going to have an edit a poem a week after this month is over. This might be one I could work on. I noticed I have a few that need work. A poem a day doesn't give much time for editing. I read it over and over and didn't catch that. DUH!!!
ReplyDeleteYes. I was thinking one new prompt per week and an extra post per week for edited poems. Put up poems you either have edited or want help editing.
DeleteI fear dreams,
ReplyDeletefear I will not know
them to be dreams
if they don't contradict
reality.
I recall teaching
Bonnie to drive.
She says "No you didn't."
That moment
I remember it,
the dream parts that
could not be true, telling
her to drive
over the line, wrong
side of the road.
How much of my long term
memory
is reality,
or dreams that wait
for me to awaken?
This is fantastic!!! The dream that could be reality or the reality that could be a dream...almost like a twilight zone episode in one small poem. I love it!!!
DeleteI know how frightening dreams like that can be but I i did laugh thinking of you teaching me to drive :-).
DeleteA Memory
ReplyDeleteDandelions in the grass
picked for a crown of gold
Stains on fingers from the juice
makes my mother scold.
I looked up, saw Grandma Great,
In her purple hat,
walking down the little path,
look, oh look at that!
I ran in, my mother stood
watching by the screen.
I was all excited then
To tell her what I'd seen.
"Mama, I saw Grandma Great
walking right outside
"No you didn't, she is dead,"
my young mother cried.
"I did, I saw her, Yes I did,"
I saw clear as a bell,
Great grandma in her purple hat--
I still remember well.
"No, she is dead," my mom insisted
"You could not have seen
your Grandma Great walking outside,
it might have been a dream."
I was just four, what did I know
of life or death to say,
picking golden dandelions
in the yard that day.
first i believe you saw her and thanks for the memory of dandelion crowns! had forgotten all about those. grandma great in lieu of great grandma throws the reading off a bit an this loses the rhythm in the last two verses. but a lovely poem and thought.
DeleteThis is a real happenstance and I remember it vividly!
ReplyDeletevery well written poem. They say that children are more able to see spirits because they haven't been told for years that they can't. I believe you saw your great-grandmother in her purple hat!!!
ReplyDeleteIt's weird. It won't let me reply to a reply, only start a new one. Yes, lovely poem, and I too had forgotten about the dandelion crowns. They actually went with the Fairy houses Bonnie talks about. LOL. And initially, I too, had a problem with "Grandma Great" but only because when you "quoted" someone, you said "great grandma." If you used "Grandma Great" there as well as the other three places, we'd understand that that is what she was called. And if she wasn't called that, then I don't get "Grandma Great."
ReplyDeleteYes, we all called her Grandma Great, that is correct. Never occurred to me of course that might sound odd. I could change the line about walking outside to something else to make it work as it doesn't need to rhyme. Thanks for the comments, I appreciate as always.
Delete