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Sunday, February 12, 2017

Lost and Found

From Tasha:

Being as it's Valentines Day on Tuesday I suggest Loves Lost and Loves Found,or both.

46 comments :

  1. I'm going to try to write a new one, but meanwhile here's one from when I was young and romantic.

    THE MASKED MAN IN LOVE: I


    I come from
    the corners of the earth trailing glory
    the wind roars
    rams dance
    and ships cut through giant waves
    at my command
    I make dogs bark
    and when I pass through your town
    you'll know it
    because when the wind blows east to west
    I make the grass bend west to east
    these things I'll do for anyone

    But I'd give you
    old things
    like certain parts of my body
    unseen and untouched by mortal woman
    in over a thousand years
    like trails through woods
    that lead to homes unbuilt
    and things that grow slowly
    as babies
    and things that fit in your pocket
    so you can carry them anywhere
    and large ungainly things
    you'd have to come home to

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    Replies
    1. I have always loved your MASKED MAN series. This is no exception. The images in the second stanza are particularly powerful, especially the last four lines.

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    2. this poem is very interesting and intriguing. I enjoyed the imagery. I could see the masked man. "in over a thousand years, like trails through woods..." breathtaking

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    3. made me smile and gave me chills. love it!

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  2. I have many that fit this theme. Sigh... But I have two very different poems that both fit the "found love" category that I really want to share.

    The first is from my "Yo Miss! I Need A Pencil!" collection of teacher poems and stories:

    A LOVE POEM

    I tell Brittany,
    Tenaira, Angelanne
    that I love them.
    That’s a lie,
    they tell me. I know

    I should own up to it,
    the fact that I
    tell the truth,
    but I do not, tell them
    that I exaggerate

    because they will
    not believe
    me, cannot believe
    a teacher could love them,
    since they do not

    love themselves
    or me. I tell them
    that I care. Angelanne
    smiles and believes
    that I do.

    She will still be late
    tomorrow, or absent.
    She will still fail
    math this year
    even with my love.

    ...

    The second one is from my collection of children's poems.

    SPRING LOVE

    I look for love, some kind of sign,
    a love for me, a love that's mine.
    I look in every place I know
    but only see my brother Joe
    out on the porch swing with a book.
    He pets Miss Kitty as I look
    out in the yard. I look above,
    a goldfinch sings. I don't find love
    or anything. Some flowers bloom.
    The roses smell like mom’s perfume.

    I look again, and then I see
    that love is here, a love for me.
    I love the flowers, love the trees.
    I love the goldfinch and the breeze.
    I love to watch Miss Kitty play.
    I love her colors, orange and gray.
    I love the porch and love the swing
    I love the warmth that comes with spring.
    I love my mom and dad. Y'know,
    I even love my brother Joe.

    I feel the love that's in the air
    and see that love is everywhere.

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    Replies
    1. great rhyme and rhythm!! I think this is a beautiful poem. I really enjoyed reading it a lot!!! I especially LOVE the last two lines!!

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    2. The first poem was very sensitive and disturbing. I enjoyed reading it. I felt for you and the girls involved. You write very well.

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    3. as much as the first poem makes my heart cry the second one makes it laugh and smile

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  3. she said foreplay
    was watching
    porno together
    she gave him babies
    then left him
    with a dirty house
    and dishes in the sink
    he thought he was
    hurt, but he felt relief
    the fights were over
    the fits were done

    he saw his old flame
    from childhood
    a gentle beauty
    she offered him comfort
    she soothed his broken brow
    and his heart fluttered
    something inside came alive
    they held hands
    kissed for no reason
    he exchanged smile for smile
    something he'd forgotten how to do...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I made this one up in my mind on the way home from a party. After seeing my oldest son, 48, with his new love.
      I feel that I want to write another. Something that will take more time and occupy myself for awhile...

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    2. Both lost and found love. Are they still together? Beautiful poem. Especially the last two lines.

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    3. One small suggestion. You have "he" three times in two lines. "he thought he was / hurt, but he felt relief" I think you can do without the one in the 2nd line. "he thought he was / hurt, but felt relief"

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    4. Yes,Victoria, Destiny moved in with Mark and they are very happy together. They bought a new bed. She bought new sheets and pillows and a quilt. She cleaned the bathrooms and the fridge and she makes meals so Mark doesn't have to cook for the kids anymore. She keeps the dishes done and everyone loves her. Julie's stuff is slowly getting put in the basement. Thanks for the suggestion. I will change it on my poem. On my paper copy.

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    5. the first four lines sum up Julie's story and maybe give more insight than you meant to give and explains a lot of their problems. as for Destiny coming back into his life she always lived on the edge waiting. a well written poem.

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    6. Maybe you dont need "felt relief" at all. Never tell readers stuff they'll know without your saying.

      he thought he was
      hurt, but the
      fights were over

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    7. And I want to know more about the childhood flame. "Gentle beauty" doesnt cut it. Flame from grade school? Junior high school? What did they do then? What do they do now? She has to be more interesting than the porno queen. I'd rewrite the whole second stanza. This could be really good.

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    8. giggle giggle...Tad, it wasn't Julie who liked the porn movies... that was one of her problems with the marriage... but that's another story.

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    9. yes it was Julie who liked the porn movies, Bonnie.She told me it was foreplay. She even chose the flick !!!

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    10. I wrote a long, long response to this, and I guess I didn't hit "publish."
      Remember that a poem isn't what really happened. A poem is words on a page -- "Best Words, Best Order" as Stephen Dobyns says -- and it starts to matter when it comes alive in someone's mind. The person who reads it isn't going to know or care who Julie is -- they're going to care about the feeling they get about love lost and love found, as they read about these people. The woman in the poem -- as distinguished from the woman in real life -- says that
      ...foreplay
      was watching
      porno together

      and that's how we get the information. We know that we're going to find out something about her and foreplay, and that that information is going to be withheld. That's what a linebreak in poetry does. that's why

      she said foreplay
      was watching
      porno together

      is different from

      She said foreplay was watching porno together.

      We don't get the porno till the third line, and it's a bit of a shock. Gender stereotypes being what they are, it's more of a surprise than if he liked watching porno. You could do even a little more with it if you wanted to --

      she said foreplay
      was watching
      porno together
      she picked it out

      So what do you have? A gross woman who doesn't get that sex is lovemaking, giving and receiving love? A strong woman who's not afraid of her desires? That's for the reader to decide.

      Then we have

      she gave him babies
      then left him

      I think you have to take this as she left the babies with him when she left. Did Julie really do that? I don't know, I don't care. My relationship isn't with Julie, it's with the character you've created in this poem -- the gross, porno-consuming woman who doesn't understand real love, for a man or for babies, or the free-spirited woman who follows her own destiny.

      Anyway, that's all we know about her, because the poem's focus shifts to him. And it's enough. It's a vivid picture. Ambiguous? Yeah, and that's good. You show, you don't tell.

      And that's what I'd like to see in the second half. You pretty much devote the second half to telling us how wonderful the childhood flame was, instead of showing us another vivid character.

      You don't want to tell the reader who they are supposed to prefer -- the porn-guzzler or the hand-holder. The reader should be able to make that choice.

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    11. twice I have re-written this poem and twice it has been taken away or something. I am going to try to write it at the bottom of the page. That might be my problem. I don't know.

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  4. Mystic magic came his way
    the day that he came out as gay
    his virginity now was lost
    but finding love was the cost

    He desired everything he got
    his new found love was very hot
    They found new things to do each day
    working out or going to a play

    What they did, they didn't care
    sometimes they did things on a dare
    They mostly avoided the public eye
    weren't ashamed, they didn't know why

    Together they finally got a place
    shared the chores of the space
    At times they cried in each others arms
    for lost children who came to harm

    He's been happy now for two years
    with his true love he has no fears
    So, sometimes a loss is really a gain
    true love is something you cannot feign.


    note: this is purely fictitious but I was thinking of my
    grandson as I wrote it.

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    Replies
    1. I liked your first poem better, but this is sweet.

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    2. Love seeing the word feign! So nice to see a word that's not used all the time. I liked it, very nice poem may it come true.

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  5. What the heck, here's the second half of that diptych.

    THE MASKED MAN IN LOVE: II

    I had salmon color for you
    and the length of an arc
    but they were already yours

    Then I wanted to give you
    your own body
    in its original wrapper
    I would have gestured over it
    and made rosebuds appear
    but they were there already

    What else was there?
    nothing that seemed more precious

    Only, at home in my closet
    several large performing bears
    that come tumbling out
    with hair that bristles
    and paws that juggle
    and soft, broad noses
    that bump and snuffle
    and blow warm breath

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    Replies
    1. Still powerful poem. I'm trying to remember what year it was we first met. I do remember these poems from all the way back then. At least 20 years. On the Prodigy Folk Music BB. LOL

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    2. I love the imagery this gives the reader! Her body wrapped in roses and the soft brown bears. Very power filled poetry! I love it!

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  6. This is adorable!Love the images of the bears.

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  7. Here's little one I wrote before, for love found. I will meanwhile be thinking.....
    My Always Valentine

    Light of my heart, song of my days
    Love of my life, you are always
    First in my prayers, first in my heart,
    My special darling right from the start.
    I love you so and together always
    We will as one spend the rest of our days.
    Together as one eternally twined
    Hearts linked to always be valentined.

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    Replies
    1. Sweet sentiments. Strangely, it reminded me of "Game of Thrones" where Daenerys Targaryen calls her husband "My sun and stars" and he called her "Moon of my life."

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    2. This is adorable! I love "light of my heart, song of my days" it is a very unique way of saying I love you.

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  8. Lost and Found

    Looked for what I'd lost
    among the diamonds and rust
    you were what I found

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    Replies
    1. I love the thought, but I think you should change diamonds and rust, since that's the name of a Joan Baez song.

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    2. I know it is... have you not noticed my last 3 poems (this one included) had lines from songs in them?

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    3. LOL. I remember one did but didn't realize this was 3 in a row. Okay, a theme.

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    4. I love your senryu! it is short and to the point. I enjoy how you use other people's songs and make sweet poetry out of them! Good job!

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  9. she told me foreplay
    was watching
    porno together
    she chose the smut
    she gave him babies
    then left him
    with children in their beds
    a filthy house
    and the sink filled with dishes
    he thought he was
    hurt, but it was relief
    the fights were over
    her fits were done

    and ever waiting
    in the background
    his childhood sweetheart
    a gentle beauty
    who lay down beside him
    gave him her soul
    soothed his broken brow
    gave him touching
    he hadn't had in years
    and his heart fluttered
    the children clung to her
    he asked her to move in
    they hold hands in public
    kiss for no reason
    he exchanges smile for smile
    something he'd forgotten how to do...

    and the house is clean
    the dishes stay done
    there are pancakes
    for breakfast
    a brand new bed
    new sheets and pillows
    a quilt that she made
    peace in the house
    love in the air
    no strife anymore
    there is laughter
    no screaming
    a gentle woman
    who touches hearts

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    Replies
    1. This is my third attempt at re-writing this poem. I hope it stays up. It is more insight to the childhood sweetheart, for Tad.

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  10. This is really developing into the story of a life. And the focus has changed. It's now about him. The two women are parts of his life, and that makes the fuzziness of detail (gentle beauty) much more acceptable.
    But there's a momentous change in this draft. Two small words, and they change everything. In the first line, "she said" is changed to "she told me." That introduces a new character into the poem, someone who cares about this young man and wants to see him happy. So the poem is not only now about him, it's now personal.
    I'll come back and add more to this if I'm not already boring everyone to death.

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    Replies
    1. I, for one, am not bored. I always feel honored when you take time with my poem. Time is the most valuable quantity on earth and you are someone who understands poetry and the poem always turns out better with your analysis. I would bet Linda feels the same although I wouldn't presume to speak for her. ... On another note though, when you asked to hear more about the childhood sweetheart, I thought you meant, when they WERE childhood sweethearts. Or maybe that is what I was looking for so I projected it onto your request.

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    2. I am really enjoying this. I could write a saga about Mark and his two women. lol. I will re write again if you guys want me too. He knew the childhood sweetheart for 33 years. So there is much to tell.

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  11. Maybe you should start writing it as prose. Don't expect anything to come of it, but maybe it will. Maybe you'll have a novel. But I do like it as a poem.
    To Vic - actually I think I meant something different -- sharper detail about her. But as the poem changed direction, that became less important.
    I actually also have a poem that uses the phrase "gentle beauty." And it's very much a love lost poem.

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  12. I finally managed a new poem on the theme, hoping someone will see it and enjoy it. It is about my late son Robin, written on his birthday, which is today.

    February 18, for Robin

    On the porch icicles sparkle in the sun
    I cherish the way they coruscate
    But the ice melts until they disappear, one by one.

    Dissolved, their beauty escapes me, gone and done.
    But then a sunbeam sparkles through
    my crystal hanging there, the rainbows

    scatter everywhere; my heart embraces
    this new beauty as the love leaps up
    and sings in my seeking heart.

    This is your birthday, and your beauty sings to me
    in every dewdrop rainbow, every flaming
    autumn tree, each rose that opens to the sun.

    Loves lost are found again remembering
    your loving heart and how you cherished everything.

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  13. Thank you so much for saying so. I appreciate your looking, seeing and commenting!

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