This week's prompt is from Tad who says:
I'm going back to the book I got the page 29 poem from. Here is a line at random from the book.
He hung up and went to the station where he was seen boarding an overnight train.
Do something with that. You don't have to use all of it, you can even change the words, but take your inspiration from that sentence
He hung up and went to the station where he was seen boarding am overnight train
ReplyDeleteHe had forgotten where he had been
All that mattered now is where he was going
The past behind him
The future ahead of him
Possibilities Endless
I like this one a lot!! Interesting take on the prompt. I hope you come back to read comments and comment on others' poems too!
Deletesometimes good to get a train when you have no idea where it is going. eeerrrr sometimes not - love paul.
DeleteWow! pretty good poem! It leaves a whole lot to the imagination and still makes a good story...
Deletethe end line says it all...possibilities endless... putting the past behind... love the concept. well written.
DeleteThank you :)
DeleteShort and sweet and to the point. Good job.
DeleteHe went to the station
ReplyDeleteas directed
did not remember
a building
on that road. There it stood.
As he entered
the red pay phone rang.
He listened,
hung up the dial phone, so
surprised it worked.
The lurker stood where
he'd been told.
He nodded, assured he
was seen boarding
the overnight train.
i used to live on a train when i was homeless. could have been worse. i could have been living in london - first tune you learn on the harmonica is the train - wooooo woooo - nice one vic - love - paul.
DeleteI like the mystery of this one. fun read!
Deleteoooooooo yes!!! This poem just wreaks of mystery and foreboding. I like how you call him "lurker". It puts real life into the character and adds a whole new dimension to his realm of being and placement in the piece of life you have created.
DeleteNice mystery. I love what's not said.
DeleteBrr, good one.
DeleteALL TRAINS ARE DELAYED TODAY
ReplyDeleteclicketty clack..clicketty clack
no trains running on this track
got the wrong train and ended up sleeping on my back
i have to talk to people on the train
though some of them turn out to be insane.
" travelling without moving " - dune.
" train in vain " - the clash
Fun poem! I liked it a lot!
DeleteInteresting. I like the first stanza best, with its concrete imagery. And I had to laugh at the last time. I'm sure you're one of the insane people. LOL
Deletehey Vic! I was going to say the same thing about Paul being one of the insane one. and yes the first verse is solid!
Deletethanks wolfie. one of those straight up on the screen ones.
Deletethanks vic. you don't have to be insane to get the train full of junkies and people singing bob dylan songs badly around here.....but it helps - love - paul.
Deletessshhhh bonita. the people i know are enough to drive anybody crazy. i'm performing this tonight at bar loco. kids full of marijuana and lager...my type of people - love - paul.
DeleteNice images and your usual jaunty air. Nice.
Deletei haven't been called " jaunty " in a while tash. thanks. top tip. never get the train to sunderland in north east england. none of you would survive - love and overpriced tickets - paul.
Deleteyes, he got on the train
ReplyDeletea lot of people had seen him
but. no, he never did get off
where did he go, you're asking me now
it's hard to say, but what
do we tell his wife?
we've searched the train
and the tracks all up and down
no one remembers him at all
the whole way from station to dismal station
if he wanted to disappear
he's doing a good job
but, it's the strangest thing
because we have no where else to look
someone said he's in the twilight zone
wherever that may be
I only hope he comes back to tell us
because I'm baffled
and it just goes against the grain
so, if you have any information
please pass it on
the authorities are in need of help
to find another missing person!
I love the stories this prompt is generating. It's like people watching with sentences. This is awesome. Still working on my page 29 poem. That was a great prompt but I never have a book next to me when I'm on the computer. LOL
Deletehe never returned no he never returned the man who never returned...The Kingston Trio... fun read!
Deletereads like a twilight zone episode wolfie. you'd be lucky to get anywhere on the trains around here. that's why god invented taxi's ha ha - " jumping the hobo train " - love - paul.
DeleteThis is a wonderful story.
DeleteGood story well done and fun to read.
DeleteThe Last Train to Nowhere
ReplyDeleteThe man shivered as a blast
of artic wind swept past
the phone station. He wondered
what had happened to phone booths.
Tears stood frozen on his face
as he hung up he looked at the
bag of Christmas gifts
that sat by his feet.
He walked away - left the bag
headed to the train station
stood on the edge of the platform
when he heard the train...
he jumped.
This poem makes a lump form in my throat. I don't know why but it's the death of something really big...big and powerful. It's a very thought provoking and powerful poem. It sort of lingers like wine on the back of my psyche...
Deletedon't think i haven't been tempted bonita. but the crappy trains around here would probably bounce off me ha ha. haunting. i'll look up your old stuff wolfie if i can bribe the library ladies with chocolate and strawberries to give me more time - love - paul.
DeleteUnexpected twist. And it works.
DeleteOoo, sad one! Poor guy. you tell it well.
DeleteHey people, I'm sorry I have been somewhat lethargic but I think I've snapped out of it. I wrote a poem for P. 29 and posted it and commented on the other poetry. If anyone cares to go back, I would appreciate it. Thanks.
ReplyDeleteWell, I was on the roll, so, I wrote a monster poem also. I commented on all the other poems, too. So I'm caught up. If you care to have a gander, I would greatly appreciate it. :-)
ReplyDeleteI finally made a poem to Page 29 and will go check out your comments Linda, when time permits. Meanwhile I've got one working for this prompt but not on paper yet. Hope you all get a chance to glance back at mine on 29.
ReplyDeleteThis is an older poem, and it kind of avoids the train, but every time I sat down to write a train poem, this one intruded. So here it is.
ReplyDeleteJOURNEY
Go to a station in a large city.
Train will do, but they run on those
tracks. A bus will take you anywhere.
I recommend the bus. Bus station then.
Go to the shortest line, and buy a ticket.
Wherever a hundred dollars will take you.
A hundred is enough. It’ll get you
to a zone where dusk comes sooner,
and with cramped muscles, a stubble,
wrinkled clothes. In that town, there’ll be a woman,
though it may take you some days to find her.
You must find her. Not to, would be
to deny her existence. She must be shown to exist.
You can draw her out if you want to.
Of course you will want to. Count on stories
about fugitive household concerns, a toke at night,
no dreams and no complaints. There’ll be no
sex with her, either, though you’d like it.
She might, too, but you don’t ask. Pain affects you
minimally, pleasure even less, healing not at all.
You live in tectofugal moments: elusive
women and aimless journeys: a flicker.
Tad so many of your poems leave me breathless with awe and amazement at how they flow so smoothly and leave the reader with so many feelings it just blows you away. this is one of them.
Deleteyou've obviously never been on english buses tad. fighting drunks and screaming kids are the norm. gotta get three trains today. falling asleep and ending up at some hellhole like fellgate is no fun. nice imagery mate - paul.
DeleteMore mystery, you provoked it with the prompt and furthered it with the poem...what are tectofugal moments? Fleeting Technology? Sounds like it, though what do I know. Very interesting poem, layers in it, and unfinished business...
Deleteyou put words together so well. This is such a thought provoking poem. I read it a few times and got something different from it each time.
DeleteTectofugal is a word I had just discovered when I was writing the poem, so I put it in. It probably doesn't belong. But it basically means moments that cause a shift in the earth's tectonic plates.
Deletegonna have to be straight up on the screen again. nearly out of time.
ReplyDeleteBRIEF ENCOUNTERS
i always talk to sad women on late night trains
married to husbands with no brains
falling asleep and waking up at fellgate is no fun
it doesn't have a fell, or a gate
and the next train is always late
time to make the last run
drunks fighting gets awfully boring
how come none of them can sing?
the metro smells of cabbage and baby wee
in the darkness
out the window i cannot see
and what the hell is all this mess?
talking to giggly chinese women is good
but on the train there is no drink, or food
and people can be very rude
thid train would go faster if it was made of wood.
" the last train to clarksville " - the monkees.
Good descriptions of your "interesting" everyday life.
Delete" interesting " is one way to put it tash. chaotic would be another way. it's " this " not " thid " obviously...doe!! in my sanctuary. the library all day today. asked if i could live here ha ha - love paul.
DeleteSome terrific imagery here and there. I got a great visual with "giggly Chinese women.."
Deletei'm a big fan of giggly chinese women wolfie. they always smell nice.....unlike the train. think they cleaned it some time last year - happy christmas. e mail me - love - paul.
Deleterealism jumps off the page with this one
ReplyDeletethanks bonita. i little too real at times. if i don't make it back here over the next couple of days, i'd just like to wish everyone happy christmas. the trains aren't running on christmas eve and day - ho ho ho - paul.
DeleteThe Spy
ReplyDeleteHis heart drummed in his breast so hard
he thought that someone would hear.
The news was dire,
some men for hire
had tracked and were near.
He hung the phone back up and bought
a ticket for the train,
he boarded with a jaunty air,
seemingly without a care,
and then got off again.
Right out the other side he slipped,
and to safety made his way
knowing that he
must remain free
to fight another day.
I really enjoyed this poem. You told a great story plus you seem to have a little rhyming scheme in there that is very complimentary to the rhythm and it adds drama to the story.
DeleteThanks Paul and Linda, You are most kind. Especially Linda! I appreciate our nice compliment.
Deletelike linda like the rhythm of this poem. it flows wonderfully.
Delete" i said his bow tie is really a camera " - simon and garfunkal. nice one tash. shades of the film " north by northwest " - have a nice christmas - love and choo choo's - paul.
ReplyDelete