Oh where have you been, my blue eyed son?
Where have you been, my darling young one?
I've stumbled on the side of twelve misty mountains
Walked and I've crawled on six crooked highways
Stepped in the middle of seven sad forests
Been out in front of a dozen dead oceans
I've been ten thousand miles in a mouth of a graveyard
Where have you been, my darling young one?
I've stumbled on the side of twelve misty mountains
Walked and I've crawled on six crooked highways
Stepped in the middle of seven sad forests
Been out in front of a dozen dead oceans
I've been ten thousand miles in a mouth of a graveyard
It's a hard and it's a hard and it's a hard and it's a hard
And it's a hard rain's a gonna fall
And it's a hard rain's a gonna fall
Since Victoria is on the road this weekend I guess she has traveling on her mind. Write a poem about your travels, how you feel about traveling, or anything that involves traveling.
I like it. :)
ReplyDeleteIn order to comment on another poet's poem, you go under their poem to the word "reply" and then put your reply in the box that pops up there. I think you meant this to be a comment on Tad's poem. Am I right Kev?
DeleteThat last train I caught I missed. Thought of stepmothers hand when I left early on. I just couldn't run fast enough to catch that bar.
ReplyDeleteThe travel thing is quite something. And when you have money it's easy. But Not free from self. East coast to West, Gulf don't count.. But been there anyway. Fact is, Nothing has changed that much when you put aside politics. No matter. I am 48 yrs. old.. I still carry the long hair, and tattoos. But gained the adventure over a dozen lifetimes. End of the day though... I would cash it all in for one more shot at that train I missed..... To this day, I still don't know where it was going.
Kev asked me to put this poem into poetic form like I did the last time. So here goes:
DeleteThat last train
I caught, I missed
Thought of stepmothers hand
when I left early on
I just couldn't run fast enough
to catch that bar
the travel thing
is quite something
and when you have money
it's easy but,
not free from self
East coast to West
Gulf don't count..
but been there anyway
fact is
nothing has changed that much
when you put aside politics
no matter...
I am 48 years old
I still carry the long hair
and tattoos
But gained the adventure
over a dozen lifetimes...
end of the day though...
I would cash it all in
for one more shot at
that train I missed...
to this day
I still don't know
where it was going...
there's a deep sadness in this poem. it makes the reader feel the loss and loneliness of the writer. well done!
DeleteI feel that sadness too.
Deletegot the adventures, the long hair and missed trains kev. just no tattoos, except on my heart. nice one mate - love and peace - paul.
DeleteYes, guys, I sensed the sadness, also. I think all poets have a great sadness somewhere in their hearts. It takes a sadness to write a poem that is "felt"...I enjoyed this poem a lot.
DeleteInteresting take on travel, and poignant...A road not taken...
DeleteYes, I agree with the others. It feels "heavy" as well as sad. Nice job.
DeleteHere's a travel poem written as an ABC villanelle, which is a form I sort of invented - a variation on the traditional villanelle. It takes us to Italy.
ReplyDeleteBAREFOOT IN FLORENCE
--For Anny Ballardini
Barefoot in Florence --
A dress that was pinkish
At four in the morning.
Pleasure in torrents,
Adventure to relish
Barefoot in Florence.
Tourists, take warning:
Pleasure can vanish
At four in the morning;
Borne by those currents,
The young and foolish
Are barefoot in Florence.
Libidos are churning --
It’s something to cherish
At four in the morning.
Anny – concurrence
To any such yearning
May still be a fetish
At four in the morning.
Barefoot in Florence.
I really enjoyed this poem. A lot of great imagery!!! I felt I was there with you...barefoot in Florence at 4 am
Deletebeautifully written and lovely imagery. I think I use the word awesome too much about your poems, but damn! it is the one word that says it all...awesome!
DeleteThis was inspired by a Listserv conversation that I came in at the end of - someone saying Anny, that's what happens when you go barefoot in Florence at 4 a.m. in a pink dress. I had no idea what it was all about, and didn't want to. I had all I needed.
Delete4 A.M. is my favourite time strangely enough and i once knew a woman called florence that went barefoot hmmmmmmmm interesting - take care tad - paul.
DeleteThis really words well and is fun to read too. Kudos.
DeleteLove the ending. And yes, that was a great pick for a line from which to build a poem! Awesome, as always. I need some new words. I need a new computer.
Deletewrote this within mins of getting the promt from bonita, but got distracted by world cup football....here we go.
ReplyDeleteON THE ROAD ( part 5 )
just get me a one way ticket to anywhere
just so long as i don't have horror in my stare
or is life sick and cruel everywhere
just want to find a place that is fair
at least i have fonzie cool hair
wanna see my friend blu in new york
and do some south carolina and boston talk
and talk to hot aussies
and crazy newcastle junkie prossies
modern life makes you want to sit in one place
and look at the reflection of your own face
on the computer screen
and see things you've already seen
lets travel to mars
and open all night bars.
" travelling without moving " - dune.
I really like this one! truth in every line. yes, let's travel to mars and open all night bars. sounds like a plan to me!
DeleteI like the rhymes. They're jaunty and hard-hitting.
Deletethanks bonita. i'd go to a martian bar......but there's no atmosphere ha ha - more moving without travelling today...bloody trains - paul.
Deletethanks tad. i try - love and peace - paul.
DeleteI would love to travel to Mars but, I don't think they have very many bars out there...maybe we could build one...or at least a museum and a library...maybe a movie theater...nice poem, great rhymes
Deletemovie theatre would be good on mars. they could show " mars attacks " and " war of the worlds. at least you'd be guaranteed a cold pint ha ha. thanks for reading wolfie - love and peace - paul.
DeleteJaunty is a great word to describe this poem, I must agree. a fun one, and imaginative too!
Deletealways been a big fan of jaunty tash. maybe why i wear my gangster hat at a jaunty angle. oh wait. that was jimmy cagney ha ha - take care you two - love - paul.
DeleteThis one is awesome. I think one of the best you've posted.
Deletethanks victoria. high praise indeed. just off to mars to open that bar...heeeeyyy, it ain;t too far - love and peace - paul.
Deletegonna have to be straight up on the screen....hmmmm we'll see how this works out.
ReplyDeleteLOST IN GRANTHAM
eleven houses in three and a half years
with lots of failed relationships
and grrrrrrrrrrrrrrr's!
my clothes in grantham had many rips
the hard road can be a tough place
rarely a smile on your face
living in the park can be fun in summer
in winter, it's a fucking bummer.
excuse the language ladies
don't read this poem to your babies.
reality hits hard in this one. good job!
Deletenot a big fan of reality bonita.it's never done anything for me - only two words can save me now " library ladies " ha ha - love and peace - paul.
DeleteVery visual poem...I know I for one do not care about your "language" sometimes and explicative is needed to annunciate a true feeling...I enjoyed this poem
Deletethanks wolfie. some of my eeerrr " language " poems would make a royal marine blush. haven't posted any of them, apart from " just push the fucking button.....end it ". you don't want to hear " she'd do anything for vodka " - you ok? have heard from you for a while - love and peace - paul.
DeleteVery descriptive of our life, and an interesting life it is, from the standpoint of a more traditional person like I am. Thanks for sharing.
Deletea lot of the time, i'm sick of interesting, weird and strange. i just want to settle down with a woman i can trust......that isn't too much to ask is it? - love and peace - paul.
DeleteI like this a lot. But I swear I'm going to stop commenting on any poem of yours that includes the word "relationship." LOL
Deletesorry vic, but isn't everything about relationships? i'll try to keep it to a minimum ha ha - woof! - paul the puppy.
DeleteI've traveled to Germany
ReplyDeletelearned how to dance
celebrated Rose Montag
fell under your trance
I've kayaked on your rivers
fished in your streams
skied down your mountains
lived in your dreams
the wanderlust moves me
from place to place
hard to stay still as
life seems one big race
But my travels are over
no more do I roam
but you lanes and your valleys
will forever be my home
don't say your travels are over bonita. i thought we were gonna rob that bank in vegas and flee to mexico.i gotta hit the road soon. anywhere really.strangely my best mate is on a cruise and is now in germany. he said " i have a strange urge to invade poland " ha ha - love and peace - paul.
DeleteThis poem is so wistful and moved my spirit. It made me feel softly for you and your wanderlust. I think our whole family is afflicted with wanderlust. Mom took us on the bus to California when we were very small children and I think it stuck with us. I still dream of going to Spain and Portugal one day.
DeleteI want to go to Ireland and of course Alaska
DeletePutting it into words is the next step to doing it! Go for it, Bonnie, go for it!
DeleteI agree with Tad. All but the 3rd stanza show us your adventures. The 3rd just tells us what you already showed us. I'd like to see more adventures.
DeleteReally like the first two stanzas -- wonder if you need the third. Maybe you can go right to the travels being over. Or maybe you do need a third stanza, but not that one - more travels, more of the good detail you have in the first two.
ReplyDelete"Are forever my home" would scan.
I thought the same thing but left it in anyway because to me a poem needs at least four verses...laughing at myself... :-)
DeleteNot necessarily every poem, but I think you're right about this one -- it does need three verses to set up the fourth. But surely you can find more adventures for the third verse...?
Delete"Recipe," a poem I wrote for one of pur prompts, has been accepted for publication by a very fine literary journal, Hinchas de Poesia.
ReplyDeletewow!!! congratulations!!!
DeleteThat is absolutely AWESOME!!! I will have to look for the poem. I am curious...
DeleteAwesome. Encouragement to keep you coming back!!
DeleteI traveled this United States
ReplyDeletefrom sea to shining sea
followed rivers up and down
and camped along the shores
I made my path in forests
climbed mountains
toward the sky
buried all my campfires
no trash there will you find
I didn't kill the animals
nor hurt their environment
padding softly, ever softly
hurting nothing in my wake
I took some flowers for my hair
choosing carefully
I laid in grass and stared at clouds
while nature dried my clothes
that were wetted by the rain
that came and went, so quickly
like my life has done...
mountains, lakes, rivers, seas
prairie winds blow gently
through my hair
the roads I traveled beckon now
I want to go again
to see if anything has changed
maybe take a child or two
and share the glory with them
let them see
and hear and feel
the life that's in our earth
all the secrets
of the outdoors
and living in a tent
or sleeping underneath the stars
feeling big
feeling small
and feeling, not at all
but, when they see
the majesty of mountains
and the dignity of seas
their hearts will swell
as did mine
being proud that they
are home...
reads like a song wolfie. i could do a harmonica track to this, with " a horse with no name " in the background. i like the majesty of mountains. one tried to climb a mountain ( or very large hill ) in the lake district, in a jimi hendrix t - shirt.....not my wisest move. but i've done stupider things - on the road again - paul.
DeleteLovely, like you!You make me feel envious for your adventures.
DeleteI particularly like the next to last stanza about taking a child or two. I almost think you don't need the last stanza, or most of it anyway.
Deletethis is so wistful and beautiful. I especially love the lines
ReplyDeleteI laid in grass and stared at clouds
while nature dried my clothes
that were wetted by the rain
that came and went, so quickly
like my life has done...
Thank you, Bonnie...
DeleteI like this a lot but what came and went, the clouds or your clothes? LOL
Delete(Giggle)
DeleteI like the movement from nostalgia to longing.
ReplyDeleteMy granddaughter visits
ReplyDeleteand I time travel.
Her mother's name
comes out of
my mouth as I caution her
to stay in my sight.
Looks so much like
her mother.
Memories feel present.
Past becomes future.
She is smart, brave,
speaks her mind.
I could almost travel
back those 40 years.
But I'm too tired.
left me with a lump in my throat. beautifully written.
Deletethe past is always with us victoria. though most of the time, i wish it wasn't. " the future is unwritten " - the clash - love and peace - paul.
DeleteAnother fine poem from your pen. I loved the feeling of this one, and the stated sense of connection you have between past and present
DeleteThrough The Seasons
ReplyDeleteOutside maple branches dance,
chilly winds their partner.
Snow has coated them with white
briefly clothing nakedness.
Then the buds at branches' end
start to swell and burgeon forth,
glistening with eager growth
reaching for the sunshine.
Fully dressed now branches sway
Feeding trunk and twig alike.
Maple keys like earrings hang
forests all aborning.
Golden glowing draperies
imitate the dwindling sun
soon the branches will be bare
finished with their dazzling.
Circling the sun we go
as we travel round and round
with the beauty, with the loss,
moving through our seasons.
this is beautiful! what a wonderful take on the prompt!
DeleteOh thank you, Bonnie, you made my heart so happy!
Deletecondolences on your loss young lady. the seasons get us all in the end don't they? beautiful poem - love and peace - paul.
DeleteJust "lost" another acquaintance from many years. One of my favorite cartoon characters said: "How do you know when you're old? When all your friends are dead." To which another replied, "Make new friends!" Sigh. It's nice to have friends who write poetry.
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry to hear of the loss of your friend. I know how hard it is to lose people with whom we have been close over the years. and yes, it is nice to have friends in poetry who understand when we write our grief out in verse.
DeleteThank you, Bonnie, I appreciate your kind words.
Delete