And the vision that was planted in my brain
still remains
within the sounds of silence
Describe silence and tell me what silence means to you. How do you hear it? Silence can be anything or everything depending on whether you enjoy silence or need distractions from the silence.
I apologize for the late post but I have been in the hospital for months and didn't realize the updates had been changed from wednesday to sunday.
Damn. One of my best slam pieces is about silence, so I guess I'll post it. I hope I don't wimp out on actually writing a new one two weeks in a row though.
ReplyDeleteSince this was meant to be a performance piece, the lines in italics actually weren't spoken aloud, but I counted from 1 to 10 in sign language.
SILENCE FOR A 10 COUNT
People are no longer used to silence,
all cell-phoned, iPodded, tuned in, turned on
(silence for a 10 count, 7, 8, 9)
geared up for the 21st century
all cell-phoned, iPodded, tuned in, turned on
blue light blinking in right ear, these guys are
geared up for the 21st century,
connected to everything. Except
blue light blinking in right ear, these guys are
texting, surfing, talking on the two-way,
connected to everything except
communication that comes from silence.
Texting, surfing, talking on the two-way
people are uneasy amid silence.
Communication that comes from silence.
(silence for a 10 count, 7, 8, 9)
People are uneasy amid silence
clear throats, shuffle feet, jingle their pockets,
(silence for a 10 count, 7, 8, 9)
maybe clap before the end of the poem.
Clear throats, shuffle feet, jingle their pockets,
turn on the car radio for the noise.
maybe clap before the end of the poem
try to fill the awkwardness of no sound.
Turn on the car radio for the noise,
so you don’t have to hear your own mind work..
try to fill the awkwardness of no sound.
(silence for a 10 count, 7, 8, 9)
so you don’t have to. Hear your own mind work..
Tune out, turn off, listen to the silence
(silence for a 10 count, 7, 8, 9)
(silence for a 10 count, 7, 8, 9)
Tune out, turn off, listen to the silence
(silence for a 10 count, 7, 8, 9)
(silence for a 10 count, 7, 8, 9)
People are no longer used to silence.
This poem really hits the proverbial nail on the head!!! People cannot stand silence. The first thing I do when Paul leaves is turn off all electrical items and read a book in silence. I love it. Always have. i like to sit an think and make up poetry or not think and try to meditate. I have made it to 10 min. meditating. I know it's no record but to not think and bear the silence is wonderful. Good work on this one , Victoria.
Deleteit is so true and we see it more and more everyday. the sad thing is it"s not peoples voices that fill the silence void- communicating face to face - but technology and texting and games etc. how long has it been since you heard children laughing and playing outside...now there is where the silence exists.
DeleteThis is a pantoum also. i had to figure out how you did it with the (silence for a 10 count...) It was very tricky!! I really am impressed.
DeleteWHERE THERE IS SILENCE
ReplyDeleteI walk in the forest, deep
clear snow from the log
where I sit. Watch while
drops drip silently
around me. Playful bunnies,
peep from holes quietly.
I am surrounded by, no sound,
snow plays round my face.
This place, is solitude profound,
silence magnified like cloud hills.
I hear a tiny ring in my ears,
years have stopped, time misplaced.
A magic spell cast in each flake,
as they cake around my warmth.
I hear nothing except the stillness,
of the day, as soft snow exposes,
nothingness.
I've always noticed how much more silent it is with a layer of snow on the ground. It's like a layer of sound insulation.
Deletesoft snow does muffle sound and creates more than just silence but and eerie silence. It almost hurts it gets so quiet. i love this poem.
DeleteThere is supposed to be a comma after the word "deep". Please acknowledge. Thank you Linda
ReplyDeleteI can visualize the scene and felt I was there with you. beautifully expressed.
ReplyDeleteSILENCE
ReplyDeleteSilence, sometimes I just can't do it
I feel like I'm being gagged and smothered
I must break through the window
It separates me from the truth
I feel like I'm being gagged and smothered
i can't hold it in, I shouldn't hold it in
It separates me from the truth
some things need said and others don't
I can't hold it in, I shouldn't hold it in
admit the truth and speak with love
some things need said and others don't
use caution, know when to be still
Admit the truth and speak with love
there is a time to listen, that's what silence is for
use caution, know when to be still
try to understand while you are silent
There is a time to listen, that's what silence is for
I must break through the window
try to understand while you are silent
Silence, sometimes, i just can't do it.
Hi people, This is my very first attempt at a pantoum or any form poetry of any kind. Please have mercy. Paul
DeleteMy only comment on this excellent first attempt is to say some things need to be said rather than just said.
Deletei am impressed. pantoums are not easy and this is really good for a first time!
DeleteAwesome job for your first try. I hope you don't mind a few pointers. Because lines repeat somethings you end up using the same word too often, in this case "I." Here's my suggestions for some changes to help that. I also think the first (and last) line would work better with no word "Silence." It's the title so you know what you're talking about.
ReplyDeleteSometimes I just can't do it,
feels like I'm being gagged and smothered.
I must break through the window.
It separates me from the truth,
feels like I'm being gagged and smothered.
I can't hold it in, shouldn't hold it in.
It separates me from the truth,
some things need said and others don't.
I'm only making suggestions and they may not even be right. Just my thoughts.
Silence
ReplyDeleteMy worst punishment
Was being put on silence:
No one would speak to me
or respond, for its duration.
At the same time I had to sit
on the piano stool all the while.
I would rather have been spanked.
Fifteen minutes was an age,
half an hour was an eternity,
an hour was unthinkable
and only used in extreme cases
for which I was grateful.
Once I was sent to my room
for one whole day, having
to stay in silence, and await
my actual punishment
for being extremely naughty.
At the time it was terrifying.
Now I relish the choice to be silent;
it differs from being silenced.
Yet now that the one
who silenced me is silent,
how happy I would be
to hear his voice again.
Funny, I was trying to think of what to write and then I sat down to do so and bingo, the old punishment popped into my head! Any comments are always so welcome, Is the last verse to repetitive? Any suggestions how it could be better said?
ReplyDeleteIt's rare that I say I think a poem should be longer, but I think it would add to the poem if you described exactly what it was you did to be sent to your room for a whole day, etc.
Deletei am like you now... being shunned when younger was horrible but now i relish the silence. some of the residents here are quite noisy and yell and I wish I could be away where I would hear only silence
DeleteTasha, I lived in a haunted house and my punishment was to be alone in the house after school...being grounded. i could hear the ghosts ans ghouls. It was terrible. I don't like silence even until this day. Nice poem, but why were you sent to your room all day?
DeleteShunning is a terrible punishment but i could tolerate that rather than being beaten. I did love your poem but like Victoria, I am curious about what you did to spend a whole day in your room awaiting a punishment! The imagery of the piano stool was terrific.
ReplyDeleteOut The Window #4 - Silence
ReplyDeleteOutside the window it' quiet
cars and trucks drive by
people walk and talk
I hear only silence
Cars and trucks drive by
like ghosts lost and abandoned
I hear only silence
as the move past to nowhere
like ghosts lost and abandoned
in buildings people walk by window
as they move past to nowhere
puppets without strings
in the buildings people walk by windows
silent replicas of reality
puppets without strings
they move through time and space.
Silent replicas of reality
tiptoe through life as we know it
they move through time and space
sshhh! don't disturb the scene.
Tiptoe through life as we know it
I hear only silence.
Sshhh! don't disturb the scene
outside te window. I hear only silence.
Wow. This is absolutely awesome! And I can picture the whole scene!
DeleteI could hear the silence through the thick pane of glass. It seemed so real. I could see the cars and trucks and the people going by on the streets and sidewalks below the window. "puppets without strings".....Beautiful pantoum
ReplyDeleteBonnie, I am studying every pantoum i see. Yours was very organized and well put together. I am not going to try a Villanelle until I write a bunch of pantoums. LOL I could hear your silence by the way.
ReplyDeleteFinally wrote something new. Only a tanka but at least it's more than nothing.
ReplyDeleteChristmas music plays
songs from my childhood. I wait
for my mother's voice
to join her favorite songs,
but silence is forever.